Finding Nemo

Ever seen this movie? Kinda think we are all like the fishes that swim in the sea, like in the animation. Remember the fish traffic that resembles our traffic on the roads? Completed with red and green lights that signals go and stop for the fishes that swim in a particular order.

It is in the morning rush hour, the time when most youths are still sleeping if not for school, that we start to resemble that animation which sought to resemble us. Each of the commuters trying to get on or get off the mrt with the default, emotionless face. Each trying to make their way in and out of the door, the escalators without hue of Mr Phua Chu Kang or the "Please Keep Left" signs. It seems worse than the fishes because at least they have a red and green light which they all follow.

But like them, who couldn't care less of the people, or fishes, around us. We just make our own way around. It seems ironic to go for prayer meeting early in the morning when the journey there seems so loveless. We disregard unfamiliar faces on our way there, and worse, we even ignore the unfamiliar face that stands next to you whom also prays to the same Father, until Pastor says, "let's turn to our neighbours and start praying, for when two or three pray together, He will be in the midst of us..." And worse again, we get irritated by traffic, morning rush hour crowds, and occasional accidents. Yes, we get irritated at accidents, not worried at all about the casualties, but blame them for wasting time.

The morning rush hour is really scary, not as in the rush, but as in the loss of emotions in this peak of human transit.

We are like the fishes, that was why Marlin felt so desperate when nobody cared if Nemo was lost. When nobody wanted to stop and help. When everybody is absolutely each of its own.

"Every person you meet is fighting some kind of battle." I say, who will really care if others are fighting a battle when all we care is really only our own battle?

Indeed the Father reveals, and these are what were being revealed by Him after going for so many morning prayer meeting alone. Love is diminishing, and all so Corinthian 13 is getting obsolete. Eventually love will reduce to only romance, which gets so warped by media that divorce is becoming a norm rather than a taboo.

I once heard of somebody so into the Kingdom's cause that all she does is to sit by the phone and make cold calls. Yup, we have heard of irritating telemarketers and insurance agents making cold calls for business, but she is not any of those. She makes cold calls to ask for their faith, "Have you heard of Jesus, sir?"

Call her crazy yup, even I call her nuts, because we all so ethnocentric as we think that it is out of the norm of having a proper job that pays well. But to Jesus we are people like fruitless fig trees for all we care is whether we get our own water and sunlight, forgetting to bear fruits for the Kingdom. We are willing to make cold calls for money, but not for the gospel? This lady, according to what I have heard, has brought about thousands of decisions throughout her life, directly because of her phone calls.

Even as I say this, even as I point this out, well, it just seems weird for me to do that too. We only do what we are comfortable with. On the other hand, we are also cynical, and justify ourselves by thinking that this lady might have also pissed many thousands more with her irritating calls, bringing them further away from Christ.

I am so afraid Jesus might be so disappointed with all of His children when He comes again. Maybe that is why He is not coming yet.

So now there is really a new meaning to "seeking first His Kingdom and His righteousness".

Not trying to prove anything or justify anything here, just some of my thoughts from going to morning praying meetings.

~~~~~~~~~~

也许有时候放放一些闷在心中很久的气也无妨。

闷了好久，在心中逗留了好久。连我自己也被骗了，以为我没事了，以为一切都已过去了。也许还没，直到在听过这首歌。

这痛，我也埋了好久了吧？虽然痛，但是我还舍不得丢掉。就想拿出来看看，也许，也像是在折磨一下自己。

最怕空气突然安静
最怕朋友突然的关心
最怕回忆突然翻滚
绞痛着不平息
最怕突然听到你的消息

想念如果会有声音
不愿那是悲伤的哭泣
事到如今
终於让自已属于我自已
只剩眼泪还骗不过自己

突然好想你
你会在哪里
过的快乐或委屈
突然好想你
突然锋利的回忆
突然模糊的眼睛

我们像一首最美丽的歌曲
变成两部悲伤的电影
为什么你
带我走过最难忘的旅行
然後留下最痛的纪念品

我们那么甜 那么美
那相么信
那么疯 那么热烈的曾经
为何我们
还是要奔向各自的幸福
和遗憾中老去

突然好想你
你会在哪里
过的快乐或委屈
突然好想你
突然锋利的回忆
突然模糊的眼睛

最怕空气突然安静
最怕朋友突然的关心
最怕回忆突然翻滚
绞痛着不平息
最怕突然听到你的消息
最怕此生已经决定自己过
没有你却又突然
听到你的消息